Birthday Celebrations

This past week I celebrated my 27th birthday and for the occasion I researched some of the halachic and hashkafic literature on the issue of birthday celebrations, which I presented at the "Teshuva of the Week" shiur, which takes place at KINS every Wednesday night after Mincha-Maariv. Below is a sampling of some of the material I presented from different rabbinic sources, which support birthday celebrations.

The late Lubavitcher Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson, strongly advocated for observant Jews to celebrate their birthdays. Rabbi Avraham Binyamin Sofer, the Ktav Sofer, son of the Chatam Sofer, was known to make a siyum on a tractate of Gemara every year on his birthday, which he details in one of his responsa (Responsa Ktav Sofer Yoreh Deah 1:148). In the biography of the Ktav Sofer, Ohel Leah, written by his Rabbi Sofer's son, the following story is recalled:

בעת ההיא בר”ח אדר יום הולדת אבינו זצ”ל בהיותו בפעסט ציוה למשמשו שלא יניח אדם לבוא לפניו כל היום, והיה רגיל מימי נעוריו לסיים על יום זה איזה מסכתא, וכל הבאים חזרו בלא מלאת מבוקשם, ובא רב גדול אחד מתלמידיו ומקורב למשפחתינו וביקש ליכנס והגידו לו את אשר ציוה רבו והיה הדבר לפלא בעיניו ובע”כ נכנס והשתומם על המראה כי מצא את רבו גועה בבכי, ושאלו רבינו למה אתה בוכה, ויאמר דע תלמידי חביבי היום הזה הוא יום אשר בו נולדתי והרי אני בן נ”ד שנים וד”ן אני את עצמי ויאמרו המושלים בואו חשבון הנפש במה עסקתי כל אותן השנים הללו אשר נצבי עלי כמו נ”ד, במה בליתי עיתותי היקרים, ומצאתים בלא תכלית הרבה, אין בי לא תורה ולא חכמה ולא צדקות, ולמא לא אבכה על בילוי ימי אשר אינם חוזרים, ויש לי לבכות מאין הפוגות, וכשמוע התלמיד את דברי רבו בכם גם הוא, כי אם בארזים נפלה שלהבת אשר כל ימיו לא עסק רק בתורה עבודה גמ”ח במדה גדולה כ”כ ובכל זאת בוכה ודואג על שנותיו, מה יענו אזובי הקיר אשר באמת בילו שנותם בבהלה, והלך לחוץ וסיפר הדבר להעומדים שם. מזה נראה גודל הענוה ומיעוט ערכו בעיניו.

On Rosh Chodesh Adar, the birthday of our father of blessed memory, when he was in Pest, he ordered his aid to not allow anyone to come in and see him on that day. He was accustomed ever since he was young to finish a masechta on that date. All who came on that particular day left without having their requests fulfilled. One great rabbi, who was one of his students and close to our family came and he requested to be allowed to enter and he was told what his rabbi had ordered and he was astonished; he forced his way in to see him and he was taken aback by what he saw for he found his rebbe sobbing. He He asked: Our rabbi why are you crying? And he said, you should know my precious student, today is the day in which I was born and behold I am 54 years olds (nun-daled, when reversed it spells the word dan, meaning judge) and I am judging myself, what I have I have done all of these years, how much have I wasted my precious time, and have not accomplished anything meaningful - I have no Torah, no wisdom and no righteousness - and why should I not cry on my wasted days which will never return? I should cry much more. And when the student heard the words of his rabbi he also began to cry. If a flame has engulfed the cedars, who all his days was only involved in Torah, avodah and chesed in such a large way and yet he still cries and worries about his years, what will the common people who have actually wasted their years be able to answer? And he went outside and told the story to those who were standing there. From here the great modesty and humility is evident.

The lesson to be learned from this moving story about the Ktav Sofer is that while birthdays are a time for a celebration they should also be a time for introspection - we should offer thanks to Hashem for having received the gift of life, while at the same time reflecting upon the ways we have used and can better use this most precious gift.