Asking for Trouble? The Method of Census Taking in the Beginning of Sefer Bamidbar

In the beginning of Sefer Bamidbar, Moshe is commanded to count Bnei Yisrael (1:2),

שאו את ראש כל עדת בני ישראל למשפחתם לבית אבתם במספר שמות כל זכר לגלגלתם

Take the sum of all the congregation of the children of Israel, by their families, by their fathers' houses, according to the number of names, every male, according to their headcount.

Moshe was commanded to count each individual from Bnei Yisrael, which was by no means an easy feat. While it might have been hard to count the people, the Abarbanel raises a much more pressing issue,

הלוא הוא בהיפך שציותה תורה (שמות ל' י"ב) "כי תשא את ראש בני ישראל לפקודיהם ונתנו איש כופר נפשו לה' בפקוד אותם", ופירשו רש"י (שם): "כשתחפוץ לקבל סכום מניינם לדעת כמה הם, אל תמנם לגלגלת, אלא יתנו כל אחד מחצית השקל ותמנה את השקלים ותדע מניינם", ואיך אם כן ציוה כאן שימנם לגולגלותם

Is this not the opposite of what the Torah commanded (Shemot 30:12) 'When you take a census of the Children of Israel according to their numbers, every man shall give Hashem an atonement for his soul when counting them...' and Rashi explains: 'when you wish to take the sum [total] of their numbers to know how many they are, do not count them by the head, but each one shall give a half-shekel, and you shall count the shekels. [Thereby] you will know their number' If this is so, how can He command here that he should count them according to their headcount?

According to Abarbanel, Hashem seems to be going back on His own word from Parshat Ki Tisa when He outlawed counting individuals. As a result of this issue Rashi, here in Bamidbar comments,

לגולגלגולם: על ידי שקלים, בקע לגולגולת

by means of shekels;“a bekka (half a shekel) per head

Rashi explains that even the though the Torah does not mention the half shekel requirement for the census in Bamidbar, it should be obvious given Hashem's words in Ki Tisa in which He said that "when you take a census" you should use a half shekel. Abarbanel, however, takes exception to Rashi's comments here and writes,

איך ציווהו יתברך במדבר סיני ובערבות מואב “שאו את ראש כל עדת בני ישראל למשפחותם לבית אבותם כל זכר לגלגלותם? והדברים האלה יעידון יגידון שלא נמנו ישראל ע”י שקלים, כי אם לגלגלותם. ומה שפירש רש”י שם שנמנו אז ע”י שקלים (כבודו במקומו מונח) אינו אמיתי בפירוש הפסוקים, כי הכתוב אומר: “שאו את ראש” ואמר: “במספר שמות כל זכר לגלגלותם” - וזה יורה שנמנו לגולגלותם ולא ע”י שקלים.

How could He have commanded them in the Sinai Desert and on the plains of Moab 'Take the sum of all the congregation of the children of Israel, by their families, by their fathers' houses, according to the number of names, every male, according to their headcount'? These words testifty and tell us that Israel was not counted with shekalim, but rather according to their headcount. And as for what Rashi explained that they were counted with shekalim (his honor remains intact), is not true and cannot be found in the verses, for the written word states: 'count the heads' and it says: 'the number of names, every male, according to his headcount' - and this teaches that they were counted by heads and not through shekalim.

The Abarbanel does not find Rashi's explanation feasible because the Torah never once mentions shekalim here in Bamidbar. As a result the Abarbanel writes that it is permitted to count Jews directly and there is no need for a half shekel. Why then did they count using a half shekel when they took a census prior to building the Mishkan? Writes the Abarbanel,

אם כן היה המנין ההוא מפני צורך הבקע (כלומר, שהוצרכו לאסוף שקלים לצורך האדנים, אדני הכסף, לבניין המשכן) ולא הבקע להכרח המניין, אם היה השם יתברך מצווה למנות, כי שומר מצווה לא יידע דבר רע...עתה שהיה המניין הכרחי בעם, ציוה יתברך שיעשה אותו מבלי בקע ולא מדבר אחר מפחד המגפה, כי “שלוחי מצוה אינם ניזוקים”...

If this is so, the count was done out of necessity for the shekel (that is to say, that they needed to gather shekalim for the sockets, the silver sockets, for the building of the Mishkan), but the shekel is not a necessity for counting, for if Hashem had given the command to count, the one who safeguards a mitzvah will know no evil. But now (in Bamidbar) when the actual count was necessary, Hashem commanded that they should conduct the census without a half shekel or anything else out of fear of a plague, because the one who sets out to perform a mitzvah is granted protection and not harmed.

According to Abarbanel the only reason a half shekel was given with the count in Ki Tisa was because the silver was needed for the construction of the Mishkan; had they not needed the silver there would have been no count. The only reason a census was conducted then was because once they had the half shekels from all Bnei Yisrael it did not hurt to count and see how many people there were. Now, in Bamidbar, when there was no need for silver and there was a need for a count, a shekel was not required. Rashi, however would disagree and claim that a half shekel is always needed to fend off a plague that can come from counting people. As he writes (Shemot 30:12)

שהמנין שולט בו עין הרע והדבר בא עליהם, כמו שמצינו בימי דוד

for the evil eye has power over numbered things, and pestilence comes upon them, as we find in David’s time

This Rashi presents a challenge for the Abarbanel. What about the story in Sefer Shmuel II (Chapter 24) in which King David was punished for counting the Jewish and a plague is brought upon them as a result? It would seem that the reason for the plague was because David counted people and not shekalim or some other object. The Abarbanel in his commentary to Shmuel II writes,

אומר אני שלא היה גודל החטא מצד עצמו כי אם כפי החוטא ומעלתו, כי דוד שבטבעו היה שפל רוח, כמו שאמר (תהלים קל"א) "ה' לא גבה לבי ולא רמו עיני" והיה נשען באלוקיו, כמו שאמר (תהלים ע"א) "בך ה' חסיתי ובה' בטחתי" ואמר (שם קי"ח) "טוב לחסות בה' מבטח באדם", ומאשר שימש בשלמות גדול ודבקות נמרץ שבעים שנה ולבסוף נעשה גבה עיניים ורחב לבב ויבטח ברוב עמו ויתהלל במתת שקר, בצוואתו את יואב שימנה את העם להתגאות בו על אויביו, לכן היה ראוי לעונש גדול...

I say that the severity of the sin was not inherent, but rather because of the sinner and his status, for David in his nature was modest, as he said (Psalms 131) 'Lord my heart is not haughty, nor mine eyes lofty' and he relied upon his God, as he said (Psalms 71) 'In thee O Lord I have taken refuge, and in thee O Lord I have relied' and he said (Psalms 118) 'It is better to take refuge in Hashem than to take refuge in man', and from the fact that he served with great integrity and vigorous devotion for seventy years and in the end he became haught and lofty and became confident because he had a large nation and he praised himself with these lies, when he commanded Yoav to count the people in order to be prideful...therefore he was worthy of a great punishment.

Abarbanel here operates based on his previously stated opinion that there is no problem to count heads and that there is no need for a half shekel. As a result he needs to explain why David was punished so harshly after counting Bnei Yisrael as individuals. Therefore he explains that David was punished for being overly confident; he wanted his people counted because he began to think that the size and strength of his nation was a result of his greatness and his accomplishments.

Rashi, in his first comments to Sefer Bamidbar writes,

מתוך חיבתן לפניו מונה אותם כל שעה, כשיצאו ממצרים מנאן, וכשנפלו בעגל מנאן לידע מנין הנותרים. כשבא להשרות שכינתו עליהן מנאן. באחד בניסן הוקם המשכן, ובאחד באייר מנאם

Because they were dear to Him, He counted them often. When they left Egypt, He counted them (Exod. 12:37); when [many] fell because [of the sin] of the golden calf, He counted them to know the number of the survivors (Exod. 32:28); when He came to cause His Divine Presence to rest among them, He counted them. On the first of Nissan, the Mishkan was erected, and on the first of Iyar, He counted them.

Even though Hashem had just counted them 13 months earlier, he counted them again because He loved them. A person counts that which is dear to him. King David was punished because he began to count the people as if they were his possessions, and as a result, according to Abarbanel, Hashem needed to remind him that the people, the world and all that inhabits it, belongs to God.

Hallel on Yom Yerushalayim

Rabbi Gil Student, managing editor of the OU Press and prominent blogger, has an interesting, concise and thorough article in the Jewish Press about the recitation of Hallel on Yom Yerushalayim. To read the article click here.
Chag Sameach!

Mourning in a Season of Joy: The Essential Lesson of Sefiras Haomer

By Howard Karesh

The Midrash, quoted by the Ran at the end of Pesachim, teaches us that when Bnei Yisrael were told of their future exodus from Egypt, they also were informed they would receive the Torah, as suggested by the word “ta’avdoon” – you will serve (Shemot 3:12),

ויאמר כי אהיה עמך וז לך האות כי אנכי שלחתיך בהוציאך את העם ממצרים תעבדון את האלוקים על ההר הזה

And He said: 'Certainly I will be with thee; and this shall be the token unto thee, that I have sent thee: when thou hast brought forth the people out of Egypt, ye shall serve God upon this mountain.'

Not only were Bnei Yisrael told what they were to receive, but also when. The letter nun in the word ta’avdoon appears to be extraneous; we learn from this nun – which has the gematria of 50 – that Bnei Yisrael were to receive the Torah on their 50^th day after leaving Egypt.

This teaching raises one simple but important question. Why did Hashem make Bnei Yisrael wait 50 days before giving us the Torah? The Rambam (Hilchos Avoda Zarah, 1:3) tells us that Bnei Yisrael, immediately before Yitzias Mitzrayim, had been steeped in the ways of the Egyptians, so much so that the influence of Avraham, Yitzchak and Ya’akov was barely felt. We had sunk to the 49^th level of tum’ah.

To have lifted Bnei Yisrael from such dire spiritual circumstances straight to Matan Torah would not have worked. Therefore, Hashem gave us one day for each of the 49 levels of tum’ah to prepare to receive His Torah.

If, then, the days of Sefiras Ha’omer are all about preparation to receive the Torah, they should be days of simcha! Why and how do we allow most of this period of time to be overtaken by mourning? The Gemara in Yevamos (62b) says that during Sefira, 12,000 pairs of R’ Akiva’s students died because “lo nahagu kavod zeh b’zeh” – they did not act respectfully toward one another.

But why punish these Torah giants – those tasked with transmitting the Torah sheb’al peh – with a punishment not found in the Torah for this type of aveirah? And of all periods of time, why now when Klal Yisrael is preparing to receive the Torah? Finally, why are we still actively mourning their passing 2,000 years after the fact?

The Tashbetz explains that the aveirah for which the talmidim of R’ Akiva were punished was a chillul Hashem caused by their behavior, an aveirah punishable by death.

But what about the Torah they were preparing to teach to Klal Yisrael? Why punish future generations of Klal Yisrael by removing the Torah of these talmidim from the scene? One possibility offered by Rav Aharon Kotler, zt’l, is that while we will mourn the Torah lost through this punishment forever, Torah tainted by the stain of disrespect is not the Torah that Hashem wants transmitted throughout the generations. Since the talmidim of R’ Akiva were deficient in this key area, they were punished with death so that the Torah that was ultimately transmitted by R’ Akiva – through R’ Meir, R’ Yehudah, R’ Yosi, R’ Shimon and R’ Elazar ben Shamua – represented a pure, complete Torah (“Toras Hashem Temima”).

With this explanation we can understand the severity of the punishment of the talmidei R’ Akiva: it was about preserving the Torah as Hashem intends for us to embrace it – with respect for others, through individuals who are complete not only in their learning, but in their interpersonal relations and treatment of others.

This dvar Torah is adapted from the sefer Hegyonai Halacha, chelek 2, by HaRav Yitzchak Mirski, shlita.

Onaas Devarim - Words of Destruction

By Neil Harris

In merit of a refuah shelaimah for Esther bas Sara

In Parshat Behar we have a mitzvah that, these days, doesn't really get as much attention as it should. Like manymitzvos, it contains components of both bein adam l’chavero and bein adam l’makom, thus allowing us to work on our relationship with others and also our connection to Hashem. The mitzvah is not to verbally harm somone, also know as אונאת דברים, ona'as devarim. I'll admit, personally, this isn't always an easy mitzvah to fulfill and requires one to constantly think before they speak.

In Vayikra 25:17 it states,

ולא תונו איש את עמיתו ויראת מאלוקיך כי אני יקוק אלוקיכם

And you shall not wrong, one man his fellow Jew, and you shall fear your God, for I am the Lord, your God.

Rashi explains,

ולא תונו איש את עמיתו: כאן הזהיר על אונאת דברים, שלא יקניט איש את חברו לא ישיאנו עצה שאינה הוגנת לו לפי דרכו והנאתו של יועץ. ואם תאמר, מי יודע אם נתכוונתי לרעה, לכך נאמר ויראת מאלהיך, היודע מחשבות הוא יודע. כל דבר המסור ללב, שאין מכיר אלא מי שהמחשבה בלבו, נאמר בו ויראת מאלהיך:

And you shall not wrong, one man his fellow-Jew: Here, Scripture is warning against wronging verbally, namely, that one must not provoke his fellow [Jew], nor may one offer advice to him that is unsound for him but according to the mode of life or the benefit of the advisor. And if you say, “Who can tell whether I had evil intentions [when I talked to my fellow in an insulting manner? Perhaps I did so in order to make him feel remorseful and repent his ways].” Therefore, it says, “and you shall fear your God.”-The One Who knows all thoughts-He knows. Concerning anything held in the heart and known only to the one who bears this thought in his mind, it says “and you shall fear your God!” - [Bava Metzia 58b]{1}

The last line of Rashi is in relation to the teaching of Rabbi Yehudah, who says that you have violated the mitzvah of Ona'as Devarim by asking questions or showing interest in making purchase for something if one doesn't have any money, because your heart knows the truth and of everything known only to the heart it is written: and you shall fear your God.

It seems that Hashem ultimately knows our thoughts and intentions specifically in regard to how we interact with others. Because of the potenial personal damage to someone from what we say, it's truly important to strive have yiras Hashem, fear of God.

Rabbi Samson Raphael Hirsch zt"l, in is commentary on Chumash elaborates on this mitzvah in the most beautiful way. Rav Hirsch says:

This prohibition of אונאת דברים embraces any and every kind of hurting the feeling of others by words, making reference to the shady past of somebody, or to that of his parents; making aggravating reproaches in times of trouble; putting to shame in public: calling somebody by jeering names; but especially hurting somebody by words in such a way that only God can see the evil intent: such as giving bad, or even only teasing advice; more, even capriciously arousing false hopes in somebody, such as asking the price of an article which you have no intention of buying.

Rav Hirsch then adds a similar idea to that of the Gemara in Bava Metzia by writing:

The admonition addresses all members of the nation together and says: they are not to hurt one another in any way, each one is to fear his God, is to know that God has His Eye and His Ear directed to each one of them, and also that He is equally the God of each of his brethren. {2}

We see from the examples cited by Rav Hirsch how careful we must be especially when it comes to bringing up someone's past, their lineage, and even using insults or nicknames.

The last two references that I'd like to bring are the Sefer HaChinuch and Kitzur Shulchan Aruch. Both, as you will see, show the importance of watching what we say to those closest to us. Sefer HaChinuch (mitzvah 338) writes,

This precept is in effect everywhere, at every time, for both man. and woman. Even toward young children it is right to take care not to pain them unduly with words, except for what is greatly necessary so that they should learn ethics and morals-and this even toward a man's own sons and daughters and members of his household. He who is lenient with them, not to inflict pain on them in these ways, will find life, blessing and honor.{3}

The Chinuch teaches us how careful we must be with how we speak to children, especially our own children.

Lastly the Kitzur Shulchan Aruch in Chapter 63 writes,

וצריך לזהר ביותר מאונאת אשתו, שלא לצערה בדברים, לפי שהאשה רכה בטבע, ועל צער מעט היא בוכה, והשם יתברך מקפיד על הדמעות, ושערי דמעות לא ננעלו

One needs to be especially careful about wronging his wife, and not distress her by speech, because a woman has a sensitive nature, and in mild distress she cries, and Hashem, may He be blessed, is strict about tears, and “The gate of tears is never locked.” (Berakhos 32b){4}

Even in the most intimate and personal relationship we might have with someone we have to be sure to use extra care with how we speak.

In an age when we text, email, chat, and occasionally speak with people face to face (this does not mean using Skype), it's more important than ever to think before we speak.With the current economy as it is and many people looking for employment, even a causal statement like, "I really had a tough week at work", can be painful if overheard by someone who is unemployed. Again, what we say and how we say it can be the difference between fulilling a mitzvah or the opposite.

{1} Translations from Judaica Press, found online at here.

{2} My thanks to Rabbi Gerson Seif for lending me his copy of Rav Hirsch's commentary, translated by Issac Levy.

{3} Translation from The Book of Mitzvah Education, Charles Wengrow, Feldheim.

{4} Translation by Rabbi Micha Berger, posted online here.

The Purpose of the Mitzvah of Shemitah

Parshat Behar begins with the commandment of shemitah, the requirement to let the Land of Israel lie fallow once every seven years. The Torah states, (Vayikra 25:2)

דבר אל בני ישראל ואמרת אליהם כי תבואו אל הארץ אשר אני נתן לכם ושבתה הארץ שבה ליקוק

Speak unto the children of Israel, and say unto them: When you come into the land which I give you, then shall the land keep a sabbath unto the LORD.

Rashi, in his commentary to the pasuk writes,

שבת לה' - לשם ה', כשם שנאמר בשבת בראשית

A Sabbath unto the Lord - for the sake of the Lord, just as it says by the Sabbath of Creation

In explaining the words of Rashi, Rabbi Amos Chacham in Daat Mikra explains,

שבת לה’ והכוונה, שבת היא לכבוד ה’, ולאו דווקא לטובת האדם, ולאו דווקא לטובת האדמה.

A Sabbath unto the Lord - and the intent is that the Sabbath be for the Lord's honor, and not necessarily for the benefit of man and not necessarily for the benefit of the Land

.

Accordingly, the Torah tells us that the purpose of observing the shemitah year is a tribute to Hashem and does not serve any other purpose.
However the Rambam, in his Moreh Nevuchim (3:39) argues,

ואמנם כל המצוות אשר סיפרנום בהלכות שמיטה ויובל, מהם לחמלה על בני אדם והרחבה לבני אדם כולם, כמו שאמר "ואכלו אביוני עמך ויתרם תאכל חית השדה" (שמות כ"ג י"א) ושתוסיף הארץ תבואתה ותתחזק בעומדה שמוטה.

Of all the commandments which we have listed pertaining to shemitah and yovel, some show compassion for certain people and broadening the reach of mankind as a whole, as it is written, 'and the poor of your nation shall eat and the leftovers shall be eaten by the animals of the field.' And so that the land should increase its crops and become strengthened from lying fallow.

This opinion of the Rambam is in direct opposition to Rashi's view on shemitah. According to the Rambam the mitzvah is to benefit man in that it provides the poor with food, since crops during the seventh year are hefker, ownerless. In addition it strengthens the land and allows it to produce more crops in subsequent years by letting it rest. Rashi, however disagrees and says that the institution of shemitah has nothing to do with people or land, it is simply a tribute to Hashem conducted once every seven years.

Lag Ba'Omer Celebrations

The Shulchan Aruch codifies (Orach Chaim 493) that the 33rd day of the Omer is a day of celebration because that is when the students of Rabbi Akiva stopped dying from a plague, which claimed the lives of 24,000. Rabbi Chezkiah da Silva (1659-1698) in his commentary to the Shulchan Aruch, Pri Chadash, asks

יש לדקדק בשמחה זו למה, ואי משום שפסקו מלמות מה בכך? הרי לא נשאר אחד מהם וכולם מתו! ומה טיבה של שמחה זו? ואפשר שהשמחה היא על אותם תלמידים שהוסיף אח”כ ר”ע שלא מתו כאלו.

There is what to be examined - why do we rejoice? If it is because they stopped dying, what is so joyous? Behold there was not one of them left and they all died! What is the nature of this joy? Perhaps the joy is over those students which Rabbi Akiva added later on who did not die.

The Pri Chadash asks what joy is there in the fact that the students of Rabbi Akiva stopped dying? There were not any left after the plague ended! He answers that what we are celebrating is not the fact that the students stopped dying, because that was tragic, but rather the fact that Rabbi Akiva was able to start anew, with a fresh crop of students, and was once again able to spread Torah throughout the Land of Israel.

Rabbi Moses Sofer (1762-1839), in his responsa (Chatam Sofer Yoreh Deah 233) explains that the joyous nature of Lag Ba'Omer predates the students of Rabbi Akiva. He writes,

ולפי דאיתא במדרש במיום שכלה החררה שהוציאו ממצרים הלכו ג’ ימים בלא לחם ואח”כ ירד המן. א”כ היתה הורדת המן ביום ל”ג בעומר וראויה לעשות לזה זכר טוב.

Since it is stated in the Midrash that from the day the provisions which they took from Egypt ran out, they walked three days without bread and then afterward the manna fell. If that is so then the manna first fell on the 33rd day of the Omer and it is appropriate to commemorate this date.

The Chatam Sofer explains that Bnei Yisrael had enough food for thirty days when they left Egypt. After the food ran out they wandered for three days in search for food until the manna fell; therefore the manna fell on the 33rd day of the Omer, which is why Lag Ba'Omer is seen as a joyous day on the Jewish calendar.

In more recent years it has become increasingly popular in Israel for people to visit the gravesite of Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai on Lag Ba'Omer, which is traditionally believed to be his yahrtzeit. Rabbi Yosef Shaul Nathanson (1808-1875), in his responsa (Shoel U'Meshiv 5:39) questioned this practice. He wrote,

אבל באמת שם תמהתי דהרי אדרבא במות צדיק וחכם יש להתענות ואנו מתענין על מיתת צדיקים ואיך נעשה יום טוב במות רבינו הגדול רבי שמעון בר יוחאי ז”ל ובמות מבחר היצורים משה רבינו ע”ה אנו עושין ז’ אדר בכל שנה ואם הזוהר קרא הלולא דרשב”י היינו לו שבודאי שמחה לו שהלך למנוחה אבל אותנו עזב לאנחה.

In truth I questioned (the practice of celebrating the memory of Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai on Lag Ba'Omer) for on the contrary, when a righteous and wise man dies, one should fast. We fast when the righteous die, so how can we make a holiday commemorating the death of our great rabbi Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai of blessed memory. With the death of the choicest of creations, Moshe Rabbeinu, we make the 7th of Adar (a fast day) every year. And if the Zohar refers to this day as the celebration of Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai, that is merely for him, for it was surely great joy for him to go to his resting place, but as for us, he left us in mourning.

Rabbi Shlomo Yosef Zevin provides an answer to Rabbi Nathanson's question in his work, Ha'Moadim B'Halacha (pg 362). He writes,

המציא טעם חדש למנהג השמחה על קבר רשב”י בל”ג בעומר, על פי המבואר בגמרא, שהמלכות גזרה על רשב”י שיהרג בחרב ועל פי נס בטלה הגזירה, ולכן עשו שמחה ביום שמת בידי שמים, ולא בידי אדם, ומטעם זה הולכים אז על קברו, כי הרוגי מלכות לא היו ניתנים לקבורה, ונמצא שקברו מוכיח על הנס.

A new reason was found for the custom of rejoicing at the gravesite of Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai on Lag Ba'Omer, according to what is stated in the Gemara, that the (Roman) government declared that Rabbi Shimon should be executed by the sword and through a miracle the decree was nullifed. Therefore they rejoiced when he died naturally, through the hands of Heaven and not by the hands of man. And for this reason we go by his grave, because those who were martyrs (during the time of the Romans) were not given a proper burial; we go and see that he was buried and it proves the miracle.

Whatever the reason for celebration - whether it be the end of the plague which struck the students of Rabbi Akiva, the subsequent renewal of Torah study after the deaths of these students, the manna falling or the death of Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai, Lag Ba'Omer is a joyous day on the Jewish calendar.

Birthday Celebrations

This past week I celebrated my 27th birthday and for the occasion I researched some of the halachic and hashkafic literature on the issue of birthday celebrations, which I presented at the "Teshuva of the Week" shiur, which takes place at KINS every Wednesday night after Mincha-Maariv. Below is a sampling of some of the material I presented from different rabbinic sources, which support birthday celebrations.

The late Lubavitcher Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem Mendel Schneerson, strongly advocated for observant Jews to celebrate their birthdays. Rabbi Avraham Binyamin Sofer, the Ktav Sofer, son of the Chatam Sofer, was known to make a siyum on a tractate of Gemara every year on his birthday, which he details in one of his responsa (Responsa Ktav Sofer Yoreh Deah 1:148). In the biography of the Ktav Sofer, Ohel Leah, written by his Rabbi Sofer's son, the following story is recalled:

בעת ההיא בר”ח אדר יום הולדת אבינו זצ”ל בהיותו בפעסט ציוה למשמשו שלא יניח אדם לבוא לפניו כל היום, והיה רגיל מימי נעוריו לסיים על יום זה איזה מסכתא, וכל הבאים חזרו בלא מלאת מבוקשם, ובא רב גדול אחד מתלמידיו ומקורב למשפחתינו וביקש ליכנס והגידו לו את אשר ציוה רבו והיה הדבר לפלא בעיניו ובע”כ נכנס והשתומם על המראה כי מצא את רבו גועה בבכי, ושאלו רבינו למה אתה בוכה, ויאמר דע תלמידי חביבי היום הזה הוא יום אשר בו נולדתי והרי אני בן נ”ד שנים וד”ן אני את עצמי ויאמרו המושלים בואו חשבון הנפש במה עסקתי כל אותן השנים הללו אשר נצבי עלי כמו נ”ד, במה בליתי עיתותי היקרים, ומצאתים בלא תכלית הרבה, אין בי לא תורה ולא חכמה ולא צדקות, ולמא לא אבכה על בילוי ימי אשר אינם חוזרים, ויש לי לבכות מאין הפוגות, וכשמוע התלמיד את דברי רבו בכם גם הוא, כי אם בארזים נפלה שלהבת אשר כל ימיו לא עסק רק בתורה עבודה גמ”ח במדה גדולה כ”כ ובכל זאת בוכה ודואג על שנותיו, מה יענו אזובי הקיר אשר באמת בילו שנותם בבהלה, והלך לחוץ וסיפר הדבר להעומדים שם. מזה נראה גודל הענוה ומיעוט ערכו בעיניו.

On Rosh Chodesh Adar, the birthday of our father of blessed memory, when he was in Pest, he ordered his aid to not allow anyone to come in and see him on that day. He was accustomed ever since he was young to finish a masechta on that date. All who came on that particular day left without having their requests fulfilled. One great rabbi, who was one of his students and close to our family came and he requested to be allowed to enter and he was told what his rabbi had ordered and he was astonished; he forced his way in to see him and he was taken aback by what he saw for he found his rebbe sobbing. He He asked: Our rabbi why are you crying? And he said, you should know my precious student, today is the day in which I was born and behold I am 54 years olds (nun-daled, when reversed it spells the word dan, meaning judge) and I am judging myself, what I have I have done all of these years, how much have I wasted my precious time, and have not accomplished anything meaningful - I have no Torah, no wisdom and no righteousness - and why should I not cry on my wasted days which will never return? I should cry much more. And when the student heard the words of his rabbi he also began to cry. If a flame has engulfed the cedars, who all his days was only involved in Torah, avodah and chesed in such a large way and yet he still cries and worries about his years, what will the common people who have actually wasted their years be able to answer? And he went outside and told the story to those who were standing there. From here the great modesty and humility is evident.

The lesson to be learned from this moving story about the Ktav Sofer is that while birthdays are a time for a celebration they should also be a time for introspection - we should offer thanks to Hashem for having received the gift of life, while at the same time reflecting upon the ways we have used and can better use this most precious gift.